A Letter to 2019

I tried to write this once but here I am.

It is because being home really brings back all the memories.

2019 has been a joke. I laugh when I say that because it basically has been. It feels like it has been the worst and best year of my life. Between my faith crisis and a toxic relationship that felt like it could've killed me to being the happiest I have been in a very long time. It is a life.

I am happy to be alive. I can't thank my friends and my family for basically keeping me alive through another year. I know my mental health has gotten so much better but at the same time I always need my friends and my family to get me through it.

I thank the toxic relationship I was in. It has taken me so long to be appreciative from what that has taught me. I know what I deserve. I know what I want. I know that I was treated so badly and that no apologize would ever fix it but I forgive him. I actually forgive him what he put me through. Took a very long time. If it wasn't for him, I don't think I would be in the situation that I am in now. I wish him nothing but the best for him and his new girlfriend. I hope things work out.

My faith crisis took most of the year I want to say but at the end I am so happy and thankful. I went into this year freshly going back to church after swearing up and down that I wouldn't and it helped. I don't think I have gotten down and prayed to my knees before this year. Towards the end of the year, my church started a Young Singles Adult group to meet every Sunday and it has brought blessings in itself. I have built such a testimony with so many other friends and I am thankful for each and everyone of them. I do have to thank God for His hand in my life. He has strengthened relationships with my friends and family members, He has brought me into the path that I needed to be.

At one point, this year I worked two jobs and was in school part time. You may say I am crazy but I loved it. I loved being busy. I loved realizing I had such a purpose. I have so much going with being as busy as I am. I realized that I can stay out of so much trouble.

As for me currently? I am home in the great state of Ohio until early January. When I return, I go back to work and school for the semester. I am in a good place. I have such a feeling that 2020 is going to bring the best blessings.

Happy Holidays everyone! See ya in 2020!