Roughly around a month ago I got access to my mission papers.
Yeah I started them! And I honestly thought this is what Heavenly Father's plan was for me. My plan was I start them summit them by the end of the summer and leave by late December/early January.
It turns out Heavenly Father had other plans for me.
I had someone walk basically back into my life and change my entire world when I was least expecting it. It was at a time when most things were not going well and I was having a really rough time. It was actually one of the biggest blessings in my life. I have slowly learned to start loving myself more because of him and I have never been happier.
My knees decided they wanted to play their games. I had terrible pain in my left knee to the point where I wanted to cry. Ibuprofen and my knee brace became my best friend. I decided to go back to the knee doctor and I told myself and Heavenly Father that it would be up to him if I would go.
I got a shot in my knee and a return appointment for the right knee that decided it wanted to join the fun. In my honest opinion(basically what I told my doctor) it is gonna be the same game I played last summer. Surgery.
I don't know what Heavenly Father has planned for me. I am hopeful to serve a mission. It has been one of my hopes and my dreams for the last three years.
It is crazy how unexpected life can be. I know Heavenly Father has a plan for me and I am slowly trying to figure it out.
I am beyond thankful for everyones love and support as I go through these challenges and difficult decisions! It is so hard but it is going to be worth it and that is what keeps me going.
So basically I don't know how to feel about it but I want to be healthy
so I am leaving it all to the Lord and hopefully I will have enough hope
and faith to carry me through.
Until next time. Hopefully not months from now.
-Kyrsten
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
Thursday, May 12, 2016
Reality
I never imagined my life would be the way it is currently six months ago.
I used be scared of jumping into things head first and following promptings(sorry Heavenly Father).
Now my life is probably just as hectic maybe a tad more hectic as it was six months ago but I wouldn't change a thing.
I used to live in this fantasy of some sorts that when my best friend got home from his mission in February and then we would magically get together and things would magically work out. Right because thats how life works out right?
Nah. I hate to admit this but for a second I had myself convinced that nothing would happen and that whenever we would talk about going on a date or something in my head I would be okay thats like six months away lots can happen.
Fast forward to now. He came back to Ohio for a funeral for one of his converts and the moment he said he was coming back I had this little freak out. It was like all of my feelings had come rushing back. He also had to see me or he at least really wanted too.
Part of me was kinda really torn. I was dead set with what was going on in my life. I had a job and I was about to start on another adventure(another story for another day).
It wasn't until I saw him that my life was kinda turned upside down in a good way. I hadn't seen him in almost a year and yet it seemed like I had known him for longer than the two years that I have known him. It was awkward at first I am not going to lie. I am one awkward person haha but we dealt with it.
The rest of the time spent with him was kinda a miracle in ways I didn't realize. My house was the calmest it had been in awhile and I realized Heavenly Father had other plans for me.
A week ago I made the decision to try long distance when I used to think people were stupid for doing long distance and I always said it never worked.
He is my best friend and my boyfriend all in one. How great is that? He listens to all my rants and deals with the fact that I always fall asleep while texting him at night. He gets along with my family and is one of the most sweetest understanding people I know.
I know this is chessy and what not and probably unexpected. Yeah I never thought this would happen in a million years but I have never been happier.
Heavenly Father certainly has things happen for a reason. Yeah it sucked that he came to Ohio for a funeral but at the same time theres always light at the end of a dark tunnel.
I love this guy and I am beyond excited to see what the future holds!
Thats the major update currently in my life.
Until next time!
-Kyrsten
I used be scared of jumping into things head first and following promptings(sorry Heavenly Father).
Now my life is probably just as hectic maybe a tad more hectic as it was six months ago but I wouldn't change a thing.
I used to live in this fantasy of some sorts that when my best friend got home from his mission in February and then we would magically get together and things would magically work out. Right because thats how life works out right?
Nah. I hate to admit this but for a second I had myself convinced that nothing would happen and that whenever we would talk about going on a date or something in my head I would be okay thats like six months away lots can happen.
Fast forward to now. He came back to Ohio for a funeral for one of his converts and the moment he said he was coming back I had this little freak out. It was like all of my feelings had come rushing back. He also had to see me or he at least really wanted too.
Part of me was kinda really torn. I was dead set with what was going on in my life. I had a job and I was about to start on another adventure(another story for another day).
It wasn't until I saw him that my life was kinda turned upside down in a good way. I hadn't seen him in almost a year and yet it seemed like I had known him for longer than the two years that I have known him. It was awkward at first I am not going to lie. I am one awkward person haha but we dealt with it.
The rest of the time spent with him was kinda a miracle in ways I didn't realize. My house was the calmest it had been in awhile and I realized Heavenly Father had other plans for me.
A week ago I made the decision to try long distance when I used to think people were stupid for doing long distance and I always said it never worked.
I know this is chessy and what not and probably unexpected. Yeah I never thought this would happen in a million years but I have never been happier.
Heavenly Father certainly has things happen for a reason. Yeah it sucked that he came to Ohio for a funeral but at the same time theres always light at the end of a dark tunnel.
I love this guy and I am beyond excited to see what the future holds!
Thats the major update currently in my life.
Until next time!
-Kyrsten
Sunday, April 3, 2016
Blessings in Disguise
Crazy how much one weekend changes everything!
This weekend I got to hear the 187th General Conference. General Conference is held twice a year in April and October. We as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints hear from our leaders of the church on lots of different topics.
During this conference, I was beyond lucky to watch it on tv with my roommates instead of on my laptop by myself. You could honestly feel the spirit more in the room and I got much more out of it.
I went into conference this weekend stressed out and still down about stuff and so I wasn't prepared as I really liked to me as much as I hate to admit that.
But honestly it hit me like a ton of bricks. In the Saturday morning session, there was a talk given by Elder Kevin R. Duncan called, "The Healing Ointment of Forgiveness". It really hit home for me about everything that had been going on recently.
I have had hard time forgiving someone and what not. I realized that since I need to forgive them then I need to see them the way that God sees them. I also feel like I was being called out in a way because soon after Elder Duncan said that we should not define people by the worst things that they have done. If we want to be forgiven for our sins then we need to forgive ourselves and others.
Again, I felt like it was something I really needed to hear. It was one of my favorite talks from this general conference. I know for a fact that I need to work on forgiveness and apply it more to my life.
Another really good talk was from the Sunday Morning session! Elder Quentin L. Cook gave a talk called "See Yourself in the Temple." Anyone who knows me knows I have a huge love for the temple. I have a goal in life to visit and do a session in every single temple in the United States. So far I have done a session in three temple and visited the grounds of five soon to be six or more depending on a road trip with my dad this week.
Fun fact about Elder Cook is that I saw him at a devotional in Ohio last August. That was sweet!
Elder Cook talked about how we should make the temple our goal. We should not focus on perfection which is huge because I know for a fact I dwell on a lot. The temple can be our place of peace and we can be close to the Lord while in the temple.
I know for a fact that while I am in the temple that I can feel closer to the Lord and I can feel safe and I can feel peace. It is a wonderful feeling to go in there and sit in the House of the Lord!
I love this talk because I totally understood everything Elder Cook was touching on. I went to the temple on Wednesday for the first time in two weeks and I instantly felt better. I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
Conference was amazing. I could go on and on about the talks that were given this weekend but I won't to make this super long.
I love this gospel so much. I am thankful for the happiness and the joy that it brings to me and others around the world. This weekend was so uplifting and it gives me so much hope for the future.
Next time, I will be blogging from ether Ohio or whatever eastern state that I will be in.
Have a great week! Love you all!
-Kyrsten
This weekend I got to hear the 187th General Conference. General Conference is held twice a year in April and October. We as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints hear from our leaders of the church on lots of different topics.
During this conference, I was beyond lucky to watch it on tv with my roommates instead of on my laptop by myself. You could honestly feel the spirit more in the room and I got much more out of it.
I went into conference this weekend stressed out and still down about stuff and so I wasn't prepared as I really liked to me as much as I hate to admit that.
But honestly it hit me like a ton of bricks. In the Saturday morning session, there was a talk given by Elder Kevin R. Duncan called, "The Healing Ointment of Forgiveness". It really hit home for me about everything that had been going on recently.
I have had hard time forgiving someone and what not. I realized that since I need to forgive them then I need to see them the way that God sees them. I also feel like I was being called out in a way because soon after Elder Duncan said that we should not define people by the worst things that they have done. If we want to be forgiven for our sins then we need to forgive ourselves and others.
Again, I felt like it was something I really needed to hear. It was one of my favorite talks from this general conference. I know for a fact that I need to work on forgiveness and apply it more to my life.
Another really good talk was from the Sunday Morning session! Elder Quentin L. Cook gave a talk called "See Yourself in the Temple." Anyone who knows me knows I have a huge love for the temple. I have a goal in life to visit and do a session in every single temple in the United States. So far I have done a session in three temple and visited the grounds of five soon to be six or more depending on a road trip with my dad this week.
Fun fact about Elder Cook is that I saw him at a devotional in Ohio last August. That was sweet!
Elder Cook talked about how we should make the temple our goal. We should not focus on perfection which is huge because I know for a fact I dwell on a lot. The temple can be our place of peace and we can be close to the Lord while in the temple.
I know for a fact that while I am in the temple that I can feel closer to the Lord and I can feel safe and I can feel peace. It is a wonderful feeling to go in there and sit in the House of the Lord!
I love this talk because I totally understood everything Elder Cook was touching on. I went to the temple on Wednesday for the first time in two weeks and I instantly felt better. I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
Conference was amazing. I could go on and on about the talks that were given this weekend but I won't to make this super long.
I love this gospel so much. I am thankful for the happiness and the joy that it brings to me and others around the world. This weekend was so uplifting and it gives me so much hope for the future.
Next time, I will be blogging from ether Ohio or whatever eastern state that I will be in.
Have a great week! Love you all!
-Kyrsten
Friday, April 1, 2016
Agency
I have been trying to think of what to blog for the last three days.
It has been driving me completely crazy because normally I can think of something and bam there is a blog post.
Life hasn't really been in a walk in the park lately and I think that is why I have been so hesitant on blogging recently.
It's funny that I have been so hesitant lately because I never am. I usually am so open on here and what not. I just haven't felt the need to.
But hello I am alive and surviving!
I really learned a huge lesson in agency the last couple of weeks that I would like to share. Having agency means you can make your own choices and basically face whatever consequences later on.
For me, that was the choice of seeing a guy who turned out to be kinda toxic. It was toxic basically from the start. I think in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't right but heck I was happy for the first time in awhile and I was having fun so why not roll with it.
It wasn't until my friends got involved that things kinda took a turn. They met him and they knew he just wasn't good news and for me that hurts. I mean who would be happy if their best friends didn't like the guy they were kinda seeing.
Anyways without going into details, I ended up walking away from the situation. And it is hard. It still is. It isn't my proudest moment but I learned that you have to make your own decisions.
You make your decisions and learn from them. Whether they are mistakes or what not.
It is so funny how lessons are learned. I didn't think it would be in that way but it happened. I also learned to totally trust my friends judgement of the guys I hang out and to honestly ask for their opinions.
Basically that has been the last couple of weeks of my life. Trying to pick up my life and figure out what the heck to do.
In other news, I leave Idaho in roughly five days or so! Gotta start this new chapter of my life somewhere!
-Kyrsten
It has been driving me completely crazy because normally I can think of something and bam there is a blog post.
Life hasn't really been in a walk in the park lately and I think that is why I have been so hesitant on blogging recently.
It's funny that I have been so hesitant lately because I never am. I usually am so open on here and what not. I just haven't felt the need to.
But hello I am alive and surviving!
I really learned a huge lesson in agency the last couple of weeks that I would like to share. Having agency means you can make your own choices and basically face whatever consequences later on.
For me, that was the choice of seeing a guy who turned out to be kinda toxic. It was toxic basically from the start. I think in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't right but heck I was happy for the first time in awhile and I was having fun so why not roll with it.
It wasn't until my friends got involved that things kinda took a turn. They met him and they knew he just wasn't good news and for me that hurts. I mean who would be happy if their best friends didn't like the guy they were kinda seeing.
Anyways without going into details, I ended up walking away from the situation. And it is hard. It still is. It isn't my proudest moment but I learned that you have to make your own decisions.
You make your decisions and learn from them. Whether they are mistakes or what not.
It is so funny how lessons are learned. I didn't think it would be in that way but it happened. I also learned to totally trust my friends judgement of the guys I hang out and to honestly ask for their opinions.
Basically that has been the last couple of weeks of my life. Trying to pick up my life and figure out what the heck to do.
In other news, I leave Idaho in roughly five days or so! Gotta start this new chapter of my life somewhere!
-Kyrsten
Thursday, March 10, 2016
End of the Semester Shanagins(or however you spell it)
I WILL BE BACK IN THE GREAT OHIO IN BASICALLY A MONTH THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
but hello.
It is obvious of how excited to go back home. I miss my sisters and my family and just being home in general.
At the same time though, I might actually miss this potato state.
The fact that the semester is ending in like a month kinda freaks me out to a point. I am not gonna lie when I say that I am going to miss so much about being here in Rexburg!
I have made so many great friends here.
I have also gone through some many changes and new things. Aka going to Salt Lake and seeing the temple and cutting off eight inches of my hair.
But honestly, I have learned so much in the last two semesters being here then I ever thought I would learn! It amazes me the things you can learn!
I know for a fact that I have such a huge testimony of the gospel more. Being at BYUI kinda does that to you and I totally do not mean that in a bad way. I think I honestly needed it.
I needed that huge slap in the face by going to church every Sunday and going to devotional. It is amazing let me tell you. I never thought I would get my patriarchal blessing like hello! That has been a blessing in itself.
It has not been an easy two semesters. That is so why I am thankful for great friends and priesthood! blessings! Never have I realized that those are Heavenly Father speaking to you until this semester till I was basically drowning.
The church is so true. Things happen for a reason and it may not seem easy but it is gonna be worth it if it isn't easy. He hears your prayers and answers them. It may not be in the time frame that you want but He answers them.
I have learned that Heavenly Father has a plan for me. It may not be sometimes what I want in life but I am slowly coming to terms that everything that happens for a reason. Sometimes life does not go as planned and it doesn't work out in your favor. Life moves on to bigger and better things.
Honestly though, I wouldn't change anything for the world. I have a group of friends who are amazing. One is graduating. One is going on a mission. One is getting married and the other is going to New York for the Hill Cumorah Pagent. It is gonna be super weird when squad shrinks in the fall I won't lie when it honestly makes me super sad.
People are placed in your lives for a reason. I know I would not change the dumb puns in the middle of Walmart and the short jokes beyond short jokes and trips to Idaho Falls almost every weekend for the world. I wouldn't change the moments where I laughed till I cried. No seriously it has happened like three times and it hurts but its worth it.
I love Idaho for the reason where I am not the same person I was when I left Ohio. I am so thankful for it.
I am going to miss Rexburg a bit but I am beyond ready to go back to Ohio.
-Kyrsten
but hello.
It is obvious of how excited to go back home. I miss my sisters and my family and just being home in general.
At the same time though, I might actually miss this potato state.
The fact that the semester is ending in like a month kinda freaks me out to a point. I am not gonna lie when I say that I am going to miss so much about being here in Rexburg!
I have made so many great friends here.
But honestly, I have learned so much in the last two semesters being here then I ever thought I would learn! It amazes me the things you can learn!
I know for a fact that I have such a huge testimony of the gospel more. Being at BYUI kinda does that to you and I totally do not mean that in a bad way. I think I honestly needed it.
I needed that huge slap in the face by going to church every Sunday and going to devotional. It is amazing let me tell you. I never thought I would get my patriarchal blessing like hello! That has been a blessing in itself.
It has not been an easy two semesters. That is so why I am thankful for great friends and priesthood! blessings! Never have I realized that those are Heavenly Father speaking to you until this semester till I was basically drowning.
The church is so true. Things happen for a reason and it may not seem easy but it is gonna be worth it if it isn't easy. He hears your prayers and answers them. It may not be in the time frame that you want but He answers them.
I have learned that Heavenly Father has a plan for me. It may not be sometimes what I want in life but I am slowly coming to terms that everything that happens for a reason. Sometimes life does not go as planned and it doesn't work out in your favor. Life moves on to bigger and better things.
Honestly though, I wouldn't change anything for the world. I have a group of friends who are amazing. One is graduating. One is going on a mission. One is getting married and the other is going to New York for the Hill Cumorah Pagent. It is gonna be super weird when squad shrinks in the fall I won't lie when it honestly makes me super sad.
People are placed in your lives for a reason. I know I would not change the dumb puns in the middle of Walmart and the short jokes beyond short jokes and trips to Idaho Falls almost every weekend for the world. I wouldn't change the moments where I laughed till I cried. No seriously it has happened like three times and it hurts but its worth it.
I love Idaho for the reason where I am not the same person I was when I left Ohio. I am so thankful for it.
I am going to miss Rexburg a bit but I am beyond ready to go back to Ohio.
-Kyrsten
Friday, March 4, 2016
Doubt Your Doubts Before You Doubt Your Faith
For the last couple of weeks, I have constantly heard the phrase from President Uchtdorf, "Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith."
I have heard that phrase used in Sacrament and Relief Society and home teaching and just everywhere. I love that phrase so much and it recently struck me of how I really need to be doubting my doubts before I doubt my faith.
I recently got a huge answer about something that I have pondering about for the last couple of weeks and it honestly took a good two people for me to start thinking about it again. This time I honestly felt like it was the right thing to do.
Except for it honestly scared the complete crap out of me. I knew it was right. I was excited about it. Yet here I was nervous for what was going to come out of it.
I became nervous about what was going to happen down the road and not what was in front of me. I guess you could say that I am scared for how it isn't just gonna affect me but other people too.
It is crazy what happens when you finally get that answer and it comes unexpectedly. Mine came from a stake conference session that people told me that I was crazy to go to because I could've done better things with my time.
Honestly? I probably could have but man am I glad I went to stake conference last weekend.
Being scared of following a prompting is Satan's way of being like nope you shouldn't do this you know you are not worth it. I have come to realize that not following a prompting is not a good idea. I have had so many blessings in the worst times but following just the simple promptings.
Hello there I am totally worth it. I can't doubt my faith especially with how far I have come.
I am not going to lie when I say that I am excited and totally freaked out all at the same time. Hey lets be real you don't grow from the inside of your comfort zone. I have learned that a whole bunch since being here in Idaho!
I really have realized that I need to face my fears head on. How I am going to do that? No idea yet but only time will tell what happens.
As long as I have faith and trust in the Lord's plan for me, I should be good!
Until next time!
-Kyrsten
I have heard that phrase used in Sacrament and Relief Society and home teaching and just everywhere. I love that phrase so much and it recently struck me of how I really need to be doubting my doubts before I doubt my faith.
I recently got a huge answer about something that I have pondering about for the last couple of weeks and it honestly took a good two people for me to start thinking about it again. This time I honestly felt like it was the right thing to do.
Except for it honestly scared the complete crap out of me. I knew it was right. I was excited about it. Yet here I was nervous for what was going to come out of it.
I became nervous about what was going to happen down the road and not what was in front of me. I guess you could say that I am scared for how it isn't just gonna affect me but other people too.
It is crazy what happens when you finally get that answer and it comes unexpectedly. Mine came from a stake conference session that people told me that I was crazy to go to because I could've done better things with my time.
Honestly? I probably could have but man am I glad I went to stake conference last weekend.
Being scared of following a prompting is Satan's way of being like nope you shouldn't do this you know you are not worth it. I have come to realize that not following a prompting is not a good idea. I have had so many blessings in the worst times but following just the simple promptings.
Hello there I am totally worth it. I can't doubt my faith especially with how far I have come.
I am not going to lie when I say that I am excited and totally freaked out all at the same time. Hey lets be real you don't grow from the inside of your comfort zone. I have learned that a whole bunch since being here in Idaho!
I really have realized that I need to face my fears head on. How I am going to do that? No idea yet but only time will tell what happens.
As long as I have faith and trust in the Lord's plan for me, I should be good!
Until next time!
-Kyrsten
Wednesday, March 2, 2016
36
In 36 kinda short but long days I will be back in the Great Ohio!
I can't begin to explain how excited I am.
Ohio is home. As much as I probably threw a fit how much I hated Ohio(sorry friends) when I was in high school or middle school, I love it.
Okay funny story before I get into this. I was wearing a Utah State shirt(don't hate me) and I was at a ward social thing and this kid comes up to me. He asked me if I was from Logan and I kinda laughed and was like no I know people who go there though. He was kinda confused and was like oh I was just wondering my brother just graduated from there. He then proceeded to ask me where I was from and I was like oh I'm from Ohio. Then he kinda freaked out and asked me why it seemed like everyone at BYUI was from Ohio.
Um? So theres my funny story from the last little while.
I am so not afraid to show my Ohio pride. It is especially hard to keep it in when you have an Ohio flag in your room and two of your roommates are from Ohio(funny how that works out right?).
I can't wait to go home and see what the heck is in store for me next. Well I kinda have a clue but that is for me to know and for you guys to find out at a latter time.
We had stake conference last weekend which was so amazing!
I defiantly got an answer to a question I have had for the last couple of weeks. I was so grateful to hear from members of the 70 and shake their hands! My advice to everyone is don't skip out on stake conference just because your regular church meetings aren't held! It was literally just what I needed.
This week or well the last two weeks, I have been trying to work on being more grateful for the blessings I have in my life. I have been so angry about things that are out of my control and its not healthy.
So I am going to end this with a couple of things I am grateful for!
1) The Gospel. I would not have survived the last few weeks without it
2) My best friends. You know who you are. Thanks for listening to me rant and rave about the same things
3) My family. Can't wait to see them
4) BYUI Don't know what I would do without this cold but great place
I love you all! I promise I will try to blog more. Sorry this wasn't too entertaining!
-Kyrsten
I can't begin to explain how excited I am.
Ohio is home. As much as I probably threw a fit how much I hated Ohio(sorry friends) when I was in high school or middle school, I love it.
Okay funny story before I get into this. I was wearing a Utah State shirt(don't hate me) and I was at a ward social thing and this kid comes up to me. He asked me if I was from Logan and I kinda laughed and was like no I know people who go there though. He was kinda confused and was like oh I was just wondering my brother just graduated from there. He then proceeded to ask me where I was from and I was like oh I'm from Ohio. Then he kinda freaked out and asked me why it seemed like everyone at BYUI was from Ohio.
Um? So theres my funny story from the last little while.
I am so not afraid to show my Ohio pride. It is especially hard to keep it in when you have an Ohio flag in your room and two of your roommates are from Ohio(funny how that works out right?).
I can't wait to go home and see what the heck is in store for me next. Well I kinda have a clue but that is for me to know and for you guys to find out at a latter time.
We had stake conference last weekend which was so amazing!
I defiantly got an answer to a question I have had for the last couple of weeks. I was so grateful to hear from members of the 70 and shake their hands! My advice to everyone is don't skip out on stake conference just because your regular church meetings aren't held! It was literally just what I needed.
This week or well the last two weeks, I have been trying to work on being more grateful for the blessings I have in my life. I have been so angry about things that are out of my control and its not healthy.
So I am going to end this with a couple of things I am grateful for!
1) The Gospel. I would not have survived the last few weeks without it
2) My best friends. You know who you are. Thanks for listening to me rant and rave about the same things
3) My family. Can't wait to see them
4) BYUI Don't know what I would do without this cold but great place
I love you all! I promise I will try to blog more. Sorry this wasn't too entertaining!
-Kyrsten
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